If You Aren't Disabled, You Should Be

So, I've always had a certain disdain for people who aren't handicapped using handicapped parking spots. But that disdain has graduated to a real disgust. There is nothing like being in someone else's shoes to get a real feel for the path they walk.

I've had the oppportunity to be in someone else's shoes, to travel their path. Well, in my case, I've been in their wheelchair and rolled down their path. After my surgery last April, it became necessary to acquire a handicap placard for my car. This placard, while allowing me easier access to places, also became the source of disgust toward a certain segment of society. You see, I KNOW there are people who cheat, who park in handicapped spots when not handicapped. I've just always figured God has some special little something planned for those people.



One day I had stopped at an Arbys. I had a little bit of time to kill in between doctor appointments and decided to kill it with a French dip and swiss sandwich and a few chapters of a murder mystery. While I'm struggling to get out of the car, leg and foot encased in 10, 20 or 80 pounds of metal cast, attempting to maneuver with a walker while not falling on my face and actually looking like I needed a walker, a huge white truck pulled up in the other handicapped spot and a teenaged girl hopped out of the passenger seat. As I watched, a middle-aged woman climbed out of the driver's seat and they both headed into the restaurant...both obviously healthy and in full use of all limbs. They glanced over at meas they passed, seeing me laboring to bring my walker around the front of my car.

Looking pointedly at the handicapped sign, then to them, then back to the truck, I gave them my very best "now aren't you ashamed of yourself parking in a handicapped spot when you aren't even handicapped" stare. I just assumed they were being lazy and grabbing an up front spot instead of walking an extra 10 feet.

Can you imagine my surprise when, rounding the front of the truck, I discovered it had handicapped license plates! These weren't just lazy ignorant people! These were people who actually had a handicapped person in their lives, knew first-hand the struggles with being handicapped and were being lazy anyway! That's even worse! That's just plain inexcusably FRADULENT! My "aren't you ashamed of yourself" stare became a "you are lower than a gutter crawling piece of filth" death glare.

Shortly after that, I stopped at Walmart and began my belabored process of struggling out of my car just as a humongous truck barrelled down the lane, screeched to a stop, backed up into the only remaining handicapped spot and a tiny thing in workout clothes hopped out and ran...RAN...into the store! I mumbled and grumbled my way into the store, grabbed the few things I needed, gave the workout girl my death glare when I passed her in an aisle, refrained from ramming her with my motorized cart and headed back to my car.

This situation wasn't one that needed to be swept under the parking spot, though. Grabbing a piece of paper, I began writing a scathing note to place on her windshield hopefully allowing a ray of intelligence to penetrate her pee brain and perhaps help change a selfish, self-aborbed behavior into one of desired service to humanity...or at least let me vent some rage and frustration.... Unfortunately, just as I was triple-underlining MORONIC, she came prancing out of the store, hopped in the truck and roared off.

I now find myself prowling parking lots looking, not only for cars parked in handicapped spots with no handicap permit, but for vehicles with permits being driven (and parked) by non-handicapped morons. And when I find one, I've got this perfectly written scathing note just waiting to change someone's life.